End of one season, start of another

(this is where I spent half of January)

So that was Summer, eh?

I love Summer but there are parts of Winter I love too, just not as much as Summer.  I'll miss the sitting out in the sun after dinner with a cool drink, not having to take forever to get dressed in the morning, not waiting for days for the washing to dry, being outdoors without having to take a coat and umbrella and getting social just because its sunny outside.

Winter has its good points too. There's comfort food and the fact that its actually enjoyable to cook, that its lovely to get snuggly in bed (unfortunately really difficult to get out of bed though), there's no sweating so its good to get out and get active and there's comfort food (did I mention that already?).

But I didn't come here to talk about the weather (ho hum), I wanted to say I'm on an 'up' today (as opposed to yesterday where it was all too hard). It may be because its Friday, or because I had a productive day at work and feeling that I've got a little more of a handle on things.  I'm also excited at the prospect of promoting not only the great stuff the people at my new workplace are doing for kids, but also promoting Mr Moneymaker's new business and life long dream.

He's selling the stuff that he loves, at last. A life-long lover of sport (not to mention the Nugget's personal Sports Manager), he has set up his own sport equipment brand, Cigno Sports and his days consist of choosing, selling and generally playing with, Soccer Balls (did you know that cigno is the Italian word for swan???).  I've even spent quite a few hours entering HUNDREDS of contacts into his database and though its been a bit of a risk (to the point where I may have to change his name from Mr Moneymaker to something else), its starting to build up.  The majority of business will be coming from Soccer Clubs in Queensland, NSW and Victoria so if you're involved in purchasing equipment for your club and you want quality, give him a call (don't forget to tell him I told you first!).

As for my new role, I'm so proud to be working for a company that has such a great concept and that can really make a difference to a young child's life.  The company is called Yoga To Go Kids and it takes the philosophy of mindfulness and well being along with a great habit for young children to take into their adult life. I've been there about four weeks now and I've been talking to the schools and the yoga teachers and seeing feedback coming back from the kids and the school teachers. Its wonderful what they're saying about the effects the classes have had on all the kids - the quiet ones, the loud ones, the hyperactive ones and the troubled ones. I'm really impressed and I want to tell everyone.

Yoga To Go Kids

Now my next move is to get the word out there about both businesses, not so much through this blog (though I will put a couple of buttons on the side here), but to promote through Facebook and Twitter.

Now if only they could afford to sponsor me to go the Digital Parents Conference in March! Oh well, that boat may have to leave without me. Literally.

*Joining With Some Grace for FYBF*

Unschooling - Why I think its a ridiculous idea (IBOT)

(One of the unschooled on The Project)

Last night one of my favourite programs screened a story on Unschooling (not to be confused with home schooling which is entirely different).  If you missed it you can read about it here.

Now I know people all have their own opinions, but when it comes to things like vaccinations and education, I stick to the facts.  When you’re playing around with children’s health and access to opportunities, its best to educate yourself with research.

There’s been a lot of of hooha (you don’t hear that word very much these days) about the movement to scare parents into adopting the practice (or non practice as it seems) of not vaccinating their children.  Not only is this dangerous to their and other children, it is not backed up by any scientific research (but I’m not going into that huge debate here, there’s been enough already).  So when this story on unschooling appeared on The Project last night, a little bit of the hippy in me died.  Diehard principles can go jump when they don’t make any sense.

Why would anyone keep their little blank canvas they created in the dark and not open them up to all that the world can offer.  One of the mothers interviewd said she wouldn’t care if her daughter didn’t find history interesting as she didn’t like it either.  Yeah, that’s intelligent.  Make sure your child doesn’t get interested in things you aren’t into because of course they are not their own little individuals, they’re an exact replica of their parent!   Aaarrrgh!  What stupidity and narrow mindedness.  

Another parent of a six year old girl said that her older son had problems at school and all he wanted to do was computer programming.  So she pulled him out to do what he wanted at home.  He’s now studying computers at university and apparently getting top marks.  All well and good if he has learnt that when things get difficult you don’t solve it by just running away to do whatever you want.  For all I know they were unsolvable problems but it is still no excuse to assume that her daughter will benefit from the same unschooling her son enjoyed.

As Carrie said after the story, some things you found dead boring to learn at school can come back to you later in life and you realise you were really glad you were there to discover it. Even my children started to tsk and hmmph at the idea. They love going to school (Year 5 and Year 9) and know that the world will still value the merit of conventional schooling in regards to finding their place.

When I was in high school (uhoh, here we go, I hear), personal computers had just started to go into the workplace (no sign of them in school of course) and I was dead against them.  I believed they were going to put everyone out of work and ruin my imagined career as a journalist.  I left at age 15 after deciding two weeks before the end of 4th Form (or Year 10 as it’s called now) that nothing interested me at school in the next two years.  I started working in an office the following March in 1982 and discovered I had a knack to operate the enemy.  I developed a bit of an obsession with the PC. First a Wang, then a Decmate where I first learnt that it felt I was creating art when I developed my first database at the CSR Library.

But I didn’t go back and get my HSC and go on to University to explore what else was open to me and I deeply regret that.  I closed my mind and have virtually never risen above a secretary in most jobs I’ve been employed in for the last 32 years.  I can’t blame my parents because they were poor and didn’t push me to go further and I can’t blame my first partner for keeping me from finding independence.  It’s my fault. Fear is still stopping me.

(from here)

But I’m trying to show my children all that the world is offering and telling them everyday they can do anything they set their mind to and I will back them all the way. Part of that is offered at home and a huge part is offered by schooling.  By the number and by the diversity of teachers and students they will come into contact with over the many years. By being away from the protective wing of their parents and learning how to interact with other personalities.  By discovering that there is more mysteries in the world yet to discover beyond what they find on the internet.

To think for themselves.

Hopefully the mothers in the story come to realise that their little sponges need more than what’s offered by their parent.  No one person is an island.

Rant over.  Your turn!

**Joining Essentially Jess for IBOT!**

My Blog Story

I discovered the world of bloggers through a course I did at work two years ago. But I didn't get into my own personal blog until late last year. I needed to reach out to other likeminded people when I found myself without a regular friend to talk to after several changes in my life.

Firstly, we sold our snuggly old house in our snuggly old street where I had several neighbours who became friends and lifelines. Our kids played together in the street and ran through each other's houses, we babysat for each other and we borrowed cans of tomatoes, coconut milk and cloves of garlic. We popped up the shops for each other when we couldn't get away from the kids. We all shared pizzas and wine on our verandah on Saturday afternoons. Nobody knows each other in this street and though I made an attempt there was nothing in common with my new neighbours.

As we moved house, our children also changed schools, one to a new primary and one started high school. That was a whole new circle of mums and dads to get to know and a whole lot of new names that I will never remember (one of my brain deficiencies, forgetting names!). It was even a new soccer team for our son.

On top of all that my best friend moved to Melbourne along with her two children who had grown up with my two like brothers and sisters. It's not the same sitting on the balcony alone with a glass of wine without her and I haven't been out dancing at a pub in ages.

So I spend alot of time on couch with my laptop reading about and commenting on a whole other world of friends and opinions and problems and happenings. I laugh occassionally and feel a little sad for some and there is even the long comfortable silences similar to when my best friend and I just sat and shared a drink without having to say anything. It doesn't compare to the real thing, but blogging will fill in for me until I can catch up with live human beings again. At least I'm not drinking alone.

p.s. the next time will be in 3 weeks when she comes to stay for the school holidays - a house full of kids will definitely see us out on the balcony solving world problems over sav blanc!

My Birthing Stories

Came across Dr Bron's request for birthing stories on Twitter and felt compelled to post about it. Love a good birth story and after filling out her survey realised I should blog it as pretty short on material at the moment.

My little Chicken is 12 and my little Nugget is 8 now so it pays to put down how they came into the world before I lose EVERY brain cell and become a vague old lady.

With Chicken I loved being pregnant and it didn't stop me from doing anything I normally do even though I was 31 yrs old. I was just thankful to actually get pregnant after having the experience of 7 years of trying with my previous partner. Once my now hubby and I decided to try, it only took a shocking 2 months to get the blue lines on the pee stick. I had already gone through the stages of disappointment, anger and acceptance that I would never have children so it was a great surprise. I was still skinny when even fully preggos and had to force myself to eat more. Not because I felt sick but I was never a big eater back then (wow! that's changed!)

She was 8 days overdue and very small. My contractions started at 1am very mildly and by 6am we went to hospital. I had spent some time in the bath at home and then at the hospital where I fell asleep for a short time but by the time she was ready to come out I had been on my back on the hospital bed with only that useless gas to help me concentrate (what is that for?????? the father?).

I was not prepared for the feeling that my insides were about to burst out of my bum!! The water didn't burst until she popped out (at about 10am) and everyone down that end (dr, nurse, husband) got covered in blood and guts. She had a little cry and they popped her on my stomach where she opened her eyes wide and stared at her mum and dad. Five minutes later after everyone had left us alone, my then partner proposed to me - of course I accepted but all I really wanted was a cup of tea!. And yes, I got that too.

When I became pregnant with the Nugget I took natural birthing classes which helped me with the fear I felt as I knew what was going to happen. They were all a bit hippy and arty but I must admit they were alot more comforting than the birthing video we got the first time round! Why they show that I don't know, we had nightmares for weeks!

I had also booked into the birthing room at another hospital (moved from out West to inner city by then) so I could have a water birth as I felt that lying on my back (as in the first time) was a totally unnatural position (gravity people!).

Nugget was twice as big as Chicken and I was 4 years older so carrying him was hard as I have a very small frame. When I went to see the midwife for regular checkups, she kept saying how big the head was! Was this supposed to be comforting? I don't think so.

By the end of the pregnancy I could hardly walk and I was suffering from the worst haemorroids in my family history (and that's some bottom history). So I spent alot of time flat on the floor with my legs in the air.

The beginning of the labour (7 days late) started strong at 1am and we got to the birth clinic at 5am. This was after my husband took a relaxing time getting showered and dressed (even asked if he should iron his jeans?????? Aaaarrrrrgghhh! We almost didn't make the clinic but after hitting what seemed like every pothole there, we desperately rang the bell while I was doubled over at the back door. Once we got in the room and the midwife (no one else there) checked me she got me to kneel down and lean on husband who was sitting on a beanbag. There wasn't time to fill up the pool as after only about 30 min (when the midwife had gone into the next room to do some paperwork!), Nugget plopped out onto the floor fast asleep (he hasn't changed, as soon as his head hits the pillow lately, he's out)!

The second time round was much more intense but thankfully faster but I did almost bite through my husbands nipple during it. After getting settled on the double bed there she said she would check in a little while whether I needed stitches or not, but I willed myself to stop bleeding as I was more scared of them sewing me up than the birthing! So only a bit of a graze and no stitches again! Yay!

I wish I had both babies in the birthing clinic in the natural position as it was much easier and took less time (but that may not be the reason in the differences).

Two children are enough for me and as I'm now 45 with a 12 yr old and an 8 yr old, my third baby is a dog - so much less work!

The birth of Chicken was probably somewhat what I expected but I wasn't prepared for the pain. I had looked into epidurals but I was worried about my dodgy back and what effects it has on a baby. If I ever had another (God forbid!) I would have the same natural way Nugget was - he is as lay back and easygoing as his birth and Chicken is as dramatic and emotional as her birth.

I don't think it effects the way I mother, but it did set down our attitudes to the personalities of our children somewhat.

I still can't understand why doctors (and every movie, ad, portrayal) insist on mothers lying back on a bed to give birth! Even sitting up is so opposite to the way the baby should come out. It's like they have to climb up to come out rather than a clear straight line down to slip out like my second one did. They never show that position in movies or TV and it gives everyone a certain view of what giving birth should look like.

What position was good or bad for you? Do you think we only see the traditional old fashioned way in the media because that's what's expected of 'ladies'?